Flash Recap: All Star Team Up

bare and joe, great team good job

There’s a ton of crime happening tonight.
Joe calls Barry for help and he appears in the backseat instantly. The indecent exposure guy almost discovers Barry’s secret identity! Barry switches Joe with the criminal driving the getaway car and places the other guy in Eddie’s backseat. The guys in the back could totally attack him, heck, the indecent exposure guy could easily expose himself again.
Criminal – “I think we lost them.”
Joe – “Uh, no you didn’t. And by the way, you’re under arrest.”
This is cute and all, but maybe it’d be quicker for Barry to bring these guys to jail.
They stop a bank robbery after the car chase.
Barry – “I’m just curious, have you not heard of me?”
Seriously, are they not reading Iris’s blog?
Eddie feels a little left out of the Joe/Barry bromance.

A swarm of bees crawl out of the AC in the car and kills the driver…add it to my nightmare list. The professor killed by bees was recently tenured…and she was two days from retirement and was finally going to settle down with her longtime boyfriend too.
Screen shot 2015-04-16 at 4.28.23 PMBarry’s metahuman CSI skills don’t detect anything odd with a victim receiving dozens of bee stings in her car.
Barry – “I don’t want to go back to STAR Labs because I hate Dr. Wells…also we should probably tell Cisco and Caitlin, they’re in danger.”
Joe doesn’t want to tell the Lab Nerds because he doesn’t trust them now…

Comic Relief – “Bees…why did it have to be bees.”
At least it’s not snakes.
Barry – “There were no stingers in the body and no dead bees in the car.”
MayBee it’s a metahuman?
Dr. Wells – “She was found with enough venom in her system to kill a herd of elephants.”
…How many elephants are in a typical herd? Because that seems like way too much venom.
Comic Relief – “Anyone want to join me in getting a bee keeper suit?”
Are you telling me Barry’s suit doesn’t protect him from bee stings? What does it do again?
Barry – “I’m pretty sure I can outrun a bee.”
But what about elephant herds?
Felicity – “Don’t run into a lake, bees will wait for you to come up for air and then they’ll sting you.”
Run in a straight line away from bees because after a certain distance they’ll stop following, they can’t travel too far from the hive. Running into shelter is also an option. Now you’ve learned more from my recaps than this show!
They go outside to see the Atom flying in.
Screen shot 2015-04-16 at 4.29.21 PM
Caitlin – “Is that a bird?”
No Caitlin, no!
Cisco – “It’s a plane?”
They’re actually doing it. This is worse than the Mark Hamill “I am your father line.”
Felicity – “It’s my boyfriend.”
Poor guy, he used to be Superman! In the movies! He’s fallen so low that he can’t even star in a B rated super hero TV show.

Screen shot 2015-04-15 at 4.33.30 PMBarry – “He seems a little…tall for you.”
Because he can shrink? The Atom can shrink right?
Felicity – “Barry Allen are you jealous?”
He’s jealous of the Atom’s suit because it’s useful.
Felicity – “He flew, I drove.”
Seriously, how did she beat him here?
Caitlin – “What’s with billionaires and being super heros?”
Yeah, that Bruce Wayne character is the only normal one of the bunch.
“I know from Felicity that you’ve been very helpful with Barry and his Flash suit.”
Barry’s suit is basically a failed fireman costume, Atom’s suit gives him super powers. He should be teaching them!
Atom – “…but I can’t quite seem to keep it up.”
And I thought he couldn’t fall lower…penis puns? Really?
Felicity – “He means the suit! His, uh, body is fine.”
Atom – “Yeah the sex is great!” (Did I just say that out loud?)
He did. I can’t BEElieve it either.
Felicity notices Barry’s weirdness and they leave to grab coffee. Wells continues to be suspicious.

Iris – “I’m following up with the lack of crime in Central City.”
I mean there was a bunch of crime going on last night, just because people get reprimanded doesn’t mean there’s less crime.
Iris – “You’ve been acting weird lately. Are you hiding something from me?”
Screen shot 2015-04-15 at 5.17.11 PMEddie – “No…of course not.”
Can anyone lie in this show?
Joe – “Do you ever go to work?”
Iris – “Heh, you’re funny.”
Yeah he is.
Eddie – “I can’t keep lying…it’s negatively affecting our relationship, we haven’t had sex in 2 weeks!”
And I thought he couldn’t be any stupider. Joe looks like he wants to kill Eddie, in another timeline maybee he does.
Eddie – ” I’m her boyfriend, when does my vote outweigh yours?”
Joe – “When you become her husband.”
Oh snap! Joe laying down the law.

Felicity – “I know you well enough to realize something’s bothering you.”
Why aren’t these two together again?
“Is it because I told Ray your secret?”
That would upset Bare, he’d want to be the one to tell Ray his secret. 19 people and 1 animal now know Barry’s secret identity.
Eddie somehow runs into Barry at the coffee shop. Does anyone work on this show?
Barry – “Don’t worry, Felicity knows.”
Eddie – “Wow, so everyone but Iris.”
Yup.
“How do you lie to everyone you care about?”
Uh, he only lies to Iris. Everyone else knows, you just established this.
Eddie – “Iris can tell I’m hiding something and it’s putting this distance between us.”
I mean Barry and her father lie to her all the time, figure it out honey.
Felicity – “Why don’t we all go out to dinner tonight? That’s usually fun.”
Bare – “Barry Allen, 5th wheel.”
It’s even weirder considering he’s kissed both girls too.

Screen shot 2015-04-16 at 4.43.12 PM
Bee Babe talks to a bee and tells it to murder someone. Later we find out they’re robots she controls…so is she just insane then? That somehow makes her hotter.
Cisco and Atom discuss “fixing” his super suit that was functional enough to fly from Starling City, a 2 hour super speed run for the Flash…
Atom – “You’re incredibly clever Cisco.”
That’s his trigger phrase, all compliments. He remembers Dr. Wells killing him in the other timeline! No one else will remember the other timeline because…they’re alive?
There’s another bee attack and the gang goes to work.
Felicity – “Bee careful guys.”
Really mature Felicity, try and beehive your age…

Barry – “I’m too late.”
A common occurrence for him.
“Where are the bees?”
And on cue, they start crawling out of the dead guy’s body. I have no idea why there were in there.
“How do I get out of here?”
He literally just ran into the building. Maybe look for exit signs? Do you need help with everything?!
Barry’s only other weakness, besides seemingly everything, is getting lost.
Barry – “Guys they’re everywhere, I’m surrounded!”
Instead of running away he stands there and gets stung. Bees > Barry > speeding bullet.
Joe finds Barry without a pulse outside. Maybe Bare’s dead 10 minutes into the episode…the Atom could takeover as the main character, the show wouldn’t skip a beat.

beeeeees

There’s a defibrillator in his suit, the suit’s finally useful! Honestly a bee suit may have been the better choice in this episode though.
Barry doesn’t die.
Cisco – “The defibrillator is fried, that’s it.”
Right after I’m impressed with the suit they throw it away, it sounds like he’s not going to fix it either because…
Felicity – “What do you think Cisco was trying to get you killed?”
Barry – No…of course not.” (Yes!)
Caitlin – “Good news Bare, you still heal fast.”
And he’s healed.
Barry – “I’m fine, alive, hungry…let’s go.”
Caitlin – “Why didn’t we get invited to dinner?…”
Someone isn’t fun at dinner parties.
There was a bee hiding in Barry’s suit. 19 people and 2 animals now know Barry’s secret identity.

They go to the fanciest restaurant in Central City. Pinkies up gang.
Iris – “How did he get a reservation here? We’ve been trying for months!”
He’s a billionaire, how have you not heard of him?
Atom – “I thought it’d be nice if it were quiet so I bought out the entire restaurant.”
In case we forgot he was rich. The worst part, they now have even less of an excuse for not inviting the Lab Nerds.

fancy living, here we come

Cisco visits Joe in the police station.
Cisco – “Weird that the second victim was also involved in robotics…it’s almost as if these bee attacks are related or something.”
Joe asked Cisco to help him investigate Mrs. Allen’s murder and he knows Joe suspects Dr. Wells, but he doesn’t mention his other timeline visions of evil Dr. Wells here because… Cisco even has another vision while talking to Joe, Reverse Flash being the trigger word here…

Iris – “So you two have no secrets between each other?  Glares at Eddie, couples should be completely honest with each other.”
Felicity – “I mean we don’t share everything, sometimes it’s just good to shut up.”
The perfect woman.
Atom – “I envy how you get to work with Harrison Wells, he’s such a swell guy.”
Barry’s trigger words are activated. He leaves the table and Felicity follows him.
Felicity – “What’s wrong? And don’t blame bad times because in my TV show shit just hit the fan.”
Spoilers!
Barry – “Dr. Wells is Reverse Flash. I trusted him, but I was wrong. What if I’m wrong about everything else too?”
Like Iris being a good friend and Eddie being competent at his job?
Eddie – “Can we please just have a nice evening?”
Iris – “So it’s my fault we’re not having a nice evening?!”
Yes.
Atom – “Well, only 17 more courses to go.”
1% problems.

bug type is weak against ice!

There’s a bee loose in the lab, but more importantly, Cisco is using the cold gun to try and kill it! This is the situation he chooses to whip out a super gun?! A bee! Dr. Wells almost gets out of his wheelchair to kill a bee, he’s just begging for them to figure out his secret identity. I think everyone overreacted here, it’s just one bee. Barry comes back and captures the bee instantly.
Dr. Wells – “You saved my life.”
Beebatable.

Cisco – “Incredible, this bee has a 360 degree camera system.”
It’s the directors dream to use the bee’s camera. More 360 shots!
She’s not a metahuman, just a mad scientist. I’ll never doubt Barry’s metahuman CSI skills again.
Dr. Wells – “If we cross reference people related to the two victims we should find our killer.”
Beecause it’s that easy.
Felicity – “Allow me! Momma’s been away from a keyboard for far too long.”
I’ve never been envious of a keyboard before, but now I am.
Both victims previously worked in a beehive at Mercury Labs. Well it is the only other nerd place in the city and they didn’t work for STAR Labs so…

the dynamic trio

Mercury CEO – “Did you find my tachyon prototype or are you here to blackmail me for another one?
Dr. Wells – “…Do you have another one? It’s for a friend.”
He just doesn’t care anymore.”
Joe – “You’re former employees were murdered.”
Mercury CEO – “I had no idea, once an employee leaves they’re dead to me, but I never thought literally…”
Joe – “Do you know anyone that works with robotic bees?”
Mercury CEO – “Yes, Brie Larvin.”
I’m surprised her name wasn’t Bee Larva.
“These two warned me about how she was making killer bees so I fired her. I doubt she held a grudge against me or anything.”
Joe – “Let us protect you.”
Mercury CEO – “Just like you took care of my tachyon prototype? Nah, buzz off.”

Felicity and Barry meet at the coffee house again.
Felicity – “Cisco and Caitlin are good people, you should trust them.”
Not sure why he trusts her more than them, I think Barry just naturally trusts people with glasses.
“Before I knew Oliver was the Arrow, he would ask me to do weird things for him like hack some company, develop cool trick arrows, check to see if his green tights made his butt looked big…”
I can’t believe it took her that long to figure out his identity.
“But I would help him anyway. Do you know why?”
Because you were in love with him? I don’t even watch Arrow and I can tell.
“Because I knew he was a good person. Just like Cisco and Caitlin.”
Pollination…I can’t figure out how to make a word pun for this.

brother and sister and sexual tension

Iris – “Do you think Eddie’s cheating on me?”
Barry – “Do you want to cheat on him with me? No…”
Iris – “What else could he be hiding from me?”
If a boyfriend is hiding something from you ladies, he’s cheating. There are no other possibeelities.
Barry – “Remember when we were kids and Joe would come home with that blank expression on his face.”
It’s because he realized he’s a single father with two shit kids.
“I never understood that look until I started working for the CCPD. I’m lucky, I only have to see the result of the gruesome murders, but Eddie, he’s out there every day.”
Confused and not doing anything most of the time.
Felicity – “It’s so fun to watch grown men play with their toys.”
She should watch me play with my legos.
Felicity – “It’s kind of like I’m dating Barry, but in Oliver’s body.”
girl nerd talkHey ladies, we aren’t just some piece of meat for you to oogle over!
Queen Bee activated her robotic bee earlier and saw STAR Labs, but she still goes ahead with her murder revenge instead of investigating who captured her bee because…
Queen Bee – “Are you going to open the window or should I buzz myself in?”
More bee jokes! It’ll never get old.

Barry – “How do we stop them?”
Metal fly swatter? Set up a whole bunch of metal flowers in the force field generator?
Cisco & Atom – “We need to stop this…Bug Eyed Bandit.”
But can she see with her eyes why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch? Probably not, Honeycomb cereal on the other hand. This was the All Star team up we were waiting for.
Felicity – “She’s in an abandoned green house.”
You can abandon those? Semi serious question.
Caitlin – “Your defibrillator ‘get out of death card’ won’t work twice, that’d just be poor writing.”
Atom – “My suit is actually pretty awesome. I can fight the bees.”
Cisco – “We haven’t tested it yet.”
We’ll do it now cliché!
Iron Man Blue Beetle Atom flies out.

Queen Bee – “You fired me, destroyed years of my research, you took everything from me.”
Except those robot bees obviously. Why doesn’t she sell these for profit?
Mercury CEO – “So, no hard feelings?”
Atom is going to fight a swarm of bees…pretty lame. He sprays the bees with…blue stuff, they follow him and he flies away. Not one bee stays back to target Mercury CEO.

Screen shot 2015-04-16 at 5.37.26 PM

This greenhouse looks just like a honeycomb. So does her dress.
Barry – “It’s over Bee.”
Why give her a warning?
“I understand how it feels when your mentor betrays you…”
Dr. Wells is still on the other line Bare.
Queen Bee – “You think you understand the sting of betrayal? I’ll show you what it means to be stung.”
The show is making so many bee puns that I’m going to walk away from this recap allergic to bees.
Barry can’t outrun bees for the second time, but luckily Felicity hacks into the bee frequency and freezes them…the bee frequency…this show sometimes …sigh.
Queen – “I’m the queen bee of this hive.”
And baby she’ll rule. Let me live that fantasy. Seriously, what a cutie.
Felicity – “She’s like my nemesis. I’ve never had a nemesis before, I don’t like it.”
The two actresses look identical and she’s wearing yellow. Maybe she’s Reverse Flash?!

Atom – “Okay Cisco…now what?”
Cisco – “Get into the water.”
But Felicity said earlier that water and bees don’t work!
Atom – “Wait, but my suit will die. Are you sure this is a good idea?”
Cisco – “Trust me.” (With his suit gone, my suit becomes the best again!)
The water plan somehow works…but instead of staying in shallow water and waiting to be picked up, he uses the last bit of energy to crash into the van. The van did something! After that battle I’m still not sure what fixes they made to his suit!
Like Barry, Atom removes his mask immediately.

boom, drop the mic

Queen Bee – “Oh you want to bring it? It’s been brought.”
What is this? Bring it On 6, Revenge of the Queen Beetch? She somehow hacks into Felicity’s computer and it explodes…but still works well enough that Felicity wins the hacking battle. Also I didn’t randomly choose the 6th movie, there are actually 5 Bring it On movies. Beelieve it.
Felicity – “Boom, drop the mic!”
Disappointed this wasn’t a bee pun.
Maybe start with handcuffing her to the chair next time Bare…somehow Queen Bee is knocked out after being handcuffed to the chair.

One bee was still in Atom’s suit and it’s still functioning after going through water, Felicity shutting them all down, and Queen Bee not controlling them anymore…They’re sentient, is this the start of Bee Terminator? Cisco jumps in front of the robo-bee to protect his friends and collapses in front of them.
Atom – “You okay buddy?”
Damn this guy is oblivious.
Barry comes to the rescue and vibrate shocks Cisco back to life.
Cisco – “Either my fear of bees are over or it just got a lot worse.”
If he got stung before, explaining his original fear of bees, then he should probably be allergic to bees. He should be dead. I thought the venom was enough to kill an elephant?

i'm sorry...okay, bye

Mercury CEO apologizes to Barry and only Barry because…
“The next time the police tell me a robotic bee murderer is looking for revenge I’ll listen.”
She literally only came to apologize. Barry asks her a few questions though.
Barry – “Why do you hate Dr. Wells?”
“15 years ago we were best friends, but then he became a completely different person after his wife died.”
One could even say he became the reverse of himself.
Joe walks right past her and she doesn’t apologize to him!

Felicity, Atom, and Barry say their farewells.
Barry – “Good luck fixing your suit.”
Atom – “I already have, the solution isn’t to go bigger, it’s to go smaller.”
More shrink puns! Did they make a small penis joke about him in the Arrow yet?

I don’t think Iris ever works.
Iris – “Barry explained to me why you’ve been so distant. It was a great excuse, valid, but it doesn’t matter.”
What a beetch.
“When you’re in love with someone you tell them everything. Or you break up.”
Looks like the honeymoon period is over for these two.

so here's my murder board

I’m surprised Caitlin wanted to go to karaoke after last times disaster.
Barry and Joe tell the lab nerds about Dr. Wells. I know Cisco proved himself with the bee sacrifice, but what did Caitlin do to earn their trust?!
So Barry did have two separate murder collage boards!
Caitlin – “But he’s paralyzed, he can’t be a speedster.”
Joe – “Is he though?”
Valid point.
Cisco – “I have dreams of Dr. Wells as the Reverse Flash…and he kills me.”
Everyone now knows that Dr. Wells is evil, except Iris. She doesn’t know anything.

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5 thoughts on “Flash Recap: All Star Team Up

  1. (sigh) This series is REALLY testing my patience here…I haven’t heard this amount of rage-inducing super-villain puns in the span of ±45 minutes since Batman & Robin. Also, FFFFFUUUUUUU***************** BARRY AND IRIS!!!!!

  2. Fun fact is that I tend to roam comic communities and every DC fanboy says how much Marvel rip-offs DC characters. But this show is all about ripping off Marvel characters – She-Gambit, She-Nightcrawler, Bully-Colossus, Electro, Male-Brothers Storm, Harry “The Shocker” Potter, Fusion-Torch, Male-Vapor and last but not least Atom-Iron Man (he is even a charming, handsome billionaire too!) despite the fact the real Atom doesn’t need a suit to shrink. They even ripped off “Fringe” in the episode 17 where the future Thawne uses a device with two pincers connected with a wire to “leech” the DNA from the original Wells to transform into him (Bodysnatcher?).
    This show is still entertaining and funny but at the end of the day there is nothing genuine or clever to look back at. With those flat, poor written support characters, the gaping plot holes and cliche-ridden dialogue I always wonder how it it got 97%(!!!) on Rotten Tomatoes. I bet it’s because of Iris is it?

    • Ok, the Marvel character ripoffs, I saw a mile away. But the high-speed plagarism? From Fringe of all shows? And let’s not forget the oh so corny-as-hell tv series name drops in the series (Breaking Bad in Tricksters, The Walking Dead in Out Of Time, etc.) It’s like they’re trying to boost their credibility as a decent TV show by riding on the coattails of other shows that actually deserve such praise…and they’re failing at it!…miserably!

      • Yeah, it’s like a “pizza with everything” – looks funny, smells funny and most likely tastes funny.
        But the plumber guy will frown at you the next day when you try to explain how this mess in your bathrrom happened.

      • Hahahaha! Nice comment! I just feel bad for the actor and actress Brandon Routh and Emily Kinny. They were both climbing up the ladder to success in acting, with their pinnacle being Superman Returns and The Walking Dead, respectively. After that, he went from Scott Pilgrim vs. The World to tv series that were likely cancelled (or on the verge of beinga cancelled, like Chuck) to this mess, while she went on a steady decline from guest starring in Forever as the world’s worst roommate, to starring in this mess, argueably as the world’s worst (and most disposable) comic book villainess.

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